Since the time I was very little, I have had a special bond with my Grandma. Some of my earliest memories are spending time at her house in Oregon (back when I was 2). When I got older, I would beg my parents to take me to her house for long weekends and when I started driving, I would often spend weekends and breaks at her house, watching movies (Shirley Temple was our favorite) and going to get milkshakes at Arctic Circle. When I was in Michigan for graduate school, I got special permission to postpone my comprehensive exams (which would allow me to graduate), in order to be with her for open heart surgery. When I found out I was pregnant, she was one of the first people I told and when it came time to name the baby, I didn't hesitate to use Patricia as Maddy's middle name, in her honor. I hoped that one day, my Grandma would be just as important to my daughter.
On Wednesday I went to Vancouver to visit my Grandma Pat, who has been in the hospital with breathing issues. At the end of the visit, her doctor told us she'd be going home and was excited about the improvements she's made. Linda, Grandma and I were all excited and I left and came home to Tacoma in a really good mood. It had been a great visit and Grandma was doing better. The next day we found out that she would not be going home. That she instead needs to go to a rehabilitation facility to get her strength up and improve her breathing and walking. While we all agree that this is probably the best decision, especially with the ups and downs with her health lately, it's not a fun reality. She really doesn't like being in the hospital and really wants to go home, and it's so hard to go against what she wants when we know that isn't best for her.
She will be moving to the rehab facility today and will spend the next 1-2 weeks there. She is sad and feeling overwhelmed. Linda is there with her and is doing a good job keeping her spirits up, but it's hard. All I want to do right now is put my arms around her and tell her it will be alright (like she has done with me hundreds of times). I'm trying to balance my life here (family, work, school, etc.) with wanting to move into her hospital room so she isn't lonely or sad or scared. She has offered me so much comfort over the years and I feel like right now I can't reciprocate that the way that I want.
Last night, I told Maddy that Great Grandma was sick and asked her if she wanted to make some videos to cheer her up. Grandma can't see really well, but she can still hear, and so we made loud exuberant videos that Linda could play to boost her spirits. Maddy shouted, I LUB YOU GRAMMIE, and she sang her ABCs and she said SEE YOU SOON. Linda said Grandma loved them and was really happy listening to Maddy over and over again. I was happy too :) Here are some photos of them "chatting" last night even though they couldn't actually see each other and weren't even in the same part of the state.
We're planning to go down on Sunday to see Grandma, once she's settled in her rehab facility. We hope that a visit will be just what she needs to get her strength up so she can get better and get back on track. And let's be honest, hopefully it will be just what I need to get my Grandma fix. We love you Grandma! Get well soon!